Perfectionism, Shame, & Low Self-Worth
Quiet the Inner Critic, Heal the Shame, & Reclaim Your Worth
East Bay therapy services
Helping you release the pressure to be perfect and feel enough just as you are
Supporting Adults and Teens in Orinda, Lafayette, Walnut Creek, Berkeley, Oakland, and nearby communities.
Online therapy available across California.
Understanding Perfectionism, Shame, and Low Self-Worth
When You Feel Like You're Never Enough
You move through life trying to get it right. You check every box, meet every expectation, and keep everyone else comfortable. From the outside, you might seem capable, even thriving. But inside, there’s a constant pressure to be better, do more, prove your worth.
It’s exhausting.
You might feel haunted by a quiet voice that says you’re falling short, no matter how much you give. You second-guess your choices, replay conversations, and carry a persistent fear of disappointing others. You may look like the “strong one,” the achiever, the one who has it together, but the cost is deep disconnection from yourself.
There’s often shame beneath the perfectionism. A belief that being lovable means being good, helpful, competent, and agreeable. That your value comes from how well you perform, not who you are.
Over time, this constant self-monitoring takes its toll. You may struggle to rest, ask for help, or even feel joy. You start to wonder: Who am I if I’m not doing or achieving? What if I’m just…me? Is that enough?
These patterns didn’t come from nowhere. They often take root in childhood, shaped by environments where love felt conditional or emotional needs went unmet. And while they once helped you survive, they don’t have to define how you live now.
Therapy offers a space to loosen the grip of perfectionism, soften the shame, and begin to feel your inherent worth, outside of performance, outside of doing.
This is what East Bay therapy for perfectionism, shame, and low self-worth can offer: a supportive space to be understood, validated, and rediscover your sense of self.
How It Shows Up & Symptoms
The Many Faces of Perfectionism, Shame,
& Low Self-Worth
Perfectionism and shame don’t always show up as obvious distress. They’re often woven into the fabric of how you function, quiet, persistent, and deeply ingrained.
You might notice:
Constant self-criticism or fear of making mistakes
Difficulty resting or relaxing without guilt
People-pleasing or struggling to say “no”
Overachieving or tying your worth to productivity
Fear of being “too much” or “not enough”
A harsh inner voice that rarely lets up
Shame about your needs, emotions, or perceived flaws
Trouble receiving praise, love, or compassion
Anxiety around being seen, judged, or rejected
Feeling like you have to earn love or belonging
You may also find it hard to identify what you want, outside of what’s expected. Or feel like you’ve lost touch with your real self beneath the striving.
These aren’t signs of failure. They’re signs you’ve been carrying too much for too long, often without enough support or space to just be human.
Therapy can help you turn toward these parts of yourself with compassion. To understand where they came from, how they’ve shaped you, and how to gently rewrite the story.
Benefits: What You Can Expect
From Therapy for Perfectionism, Shame, & Low Self-Worth
In therapy, you don’t have to perform or prove anything. You get to show up just as you are and be met there.
You may begin to experience:
More self-compassion and less inner criticism
A softening of the pressure to be perfect
A clearer sense of your needs, limits, and desires
The ability to set boundaries without guilt
Relief from chronic shame or the fear of being “too much”
More authentic relationships rooted in mutual respect
A growing sense of worth that isn’t tied to achievement
The freedom to rest, play, and feel joy, without earning it
Over time, the need to be perfect may lose its grip. You might find yourself breathing easier, trusting your own voice, and feeling more at home in your body and life.
A Note
About Bountiful Health
At Bountiful Health, an East Bay therapy practice, we offer warm, integrative care for adults and teens navigating perfectionism, shame, and low self-worth. Our practice was created as a space where you don’t have to shrink, mask, or prove anything to be supported.
We provide relational, trauma-informed therapy rooted in real connection and care. Whether you’re working through lifelong patterns or simply feeling lost in your own expectations, we’re here to help you find your sense of self.
Located in Orinda, CA, we serve the greater East Bay, including Lafayette, Walnut Creek, Berkeley, and Oakland. Online therapy is available throughout California.
Our Therapeutic Approach
Therapy at Bountiful Health isn’t about fixing you, it’s about honoring who you’ve had to be, and helping you return to your self.
We draw from psychodynamic, trauma-informed, attachment-based, and relational approaches, amongst others, to support deep, lasting change. Our work goes beyond symptom relief; we hold space for your story, your relationships, your emotions, and your growth.
Together, we follow your pace. We explore with curiosity, not judgment. And slowly, we begin to unwind the patterns that have shaped how you see yourself and relate to the world.
You are not broken. You are worthy of care that meets you in your full humanity, and that’s what we’re here to offer.
Ready to Take the First Step Together?
If any of this resonates, or even just feels familiar, I invite you to reach out. You don’t need to have the perfect words. You don’t have to be fully “ready.” Just open to the possibility that there’s more waiting for you.
Click below or call/text 925-259-3145 for more information or to book a free 20-minute consultation.
Located in Orinda, CA, and serving Lafayette, Walnut Creek, Oakland, and nearby East Bay communities. Online therapy is available across California.
This East Bay therapy practice is here to support you in letting go of perfectionism, shame, and low self-worth—so you can finally feel enough, just as you are.
If any part of this resonates, or even if you just feel something stir, I invite you to reach out. You don’t need to have the right words. You don’t have to feel “ready.” Just curious enough to begin.
Click below or call/text 925-259-3145 for more information or to book a free 20-minute consultation.
Located in Orinda, CA, and serving Lafayette, Walnut Creek, Oakland, and nearby East Bay communities. Online therapy is available across California.